smokin' hot - smokin' not

sometimes i wished i still smoked -- that i had that rebellious affectation -- but i know first-hand how it hurts to realize someone would choose their affectation over my affection and that's a hurt i choose to prevent, for those who care about me.

frito bandito [originally posted in may of 2006]

let's just say, hypothetically, that you really like fritos. you know they're not good for you, so you try not to be around them. but, you do like them. a lot. when you see them, out & about, amongst the other choices in a normal life-setting, you can see them for what they are -- an unhealthy choice. you can make another choice b/c in comparison to the healthy choices, the fritos are obviously not the way to go.

but, you do like them. a lot.

and, you know that sometimes there are fritos available... say... an open bag of fritos that's been left... unattended. you know that happens sometimes, and you also know certain places that are a little more probable locations for an unattended, open bag of fritos.

you begin to think of these fritos, and you really can't get them off your mind. because you do like them. a lot. and, you know that there's this open bag, unattended, so you can potentially have as many as you want. and, no one will have to know. you're not 100% certain that the unattended fritos will be where you think they might be, so it's not like anyone can say you are going on purpose for the fritos. there's just a chance that they will be left open, unattended, there... and you know where "there" is. you have a very plausible reason for being there anyway, so you can go there unquestioned. and just check to see if the fritos are there. you might not even have any, even if they are there, unattended.

now, say that in addition to liking the fritos. a lot. and knowing where they might be. unattended. say that in addition to these issues, you also have made an accountability pact with someone and promised not to have fritos. ever.

is it wrong to go where the fritos might be, knowing you've promised not to have any? can you go there, and not have any? is it wrong to simply want the fritos? let's say that it is reasonable to expect of you that you will not have them, can it moreover be expected of you, that you will not even want them? let's say that you have decided that you aren't going to actually have any of them, but you just want to know if they're still there -- an open, unattended bag of fritos? is it wrong to periodically check to see if the open, unattended bag of fritos still exists?

it's possible that the open, unattended bag was an illusion. it's possible that it never existed, and it's possible that it did exist but does not now exist. is it wrong to want it to be there... open & unattended, simply waiting?

i just want my mileage back, that's all.

people say coming back from an injury is like starting over, but it's not. at least, it's not like starting from square 1. it's more like starting from square -3. if you're starting from square 1 you are out of shape, so you just do as much as you can until you are too tired to continue. you will be all tight and need to stretch. your muscles will hurt. you'll be tired. but it's all part of growing and you just push on through it.

but, if you're coming back from an injury, it's all that plus the pain of the injury and the fear that you're re-injuring -- the confusion of not knowing how much you can do. is this a regular, normal ache or is it an injury? you can't tell what you should push through and when you need to dial it back. you have the energy and the muscles are all ready to go, but you aren't supposed to go out every day, so you sit around half the time because you can't stand the stat bike. boredom. frustration.

if you're starting from scratch, the increased activity will make you physically tired. if you're coming back from an injury, the tiredness comes not from increased activity, but from the decrease, and not from your physical self, but instead from your soul.

fairly certain those lovely pumpkin pancakes i ate for breakfast contained ex-lax.

watching some commershals just now and both radio shack & old navy are stressing that they have sales saturday in addition to friday. heh. can't get enough people to get up at 4am for a wee bit of competitive consumerism? perhaps the retailers will be participating in a wee bit of competitive catering-to-the-customers for a change. don't make us work so hard to spend our money with you. you want our money? YOU work for it!

see - here's the thing: people are sick of fighting over bargains. we are simplifying our lives and cutting out a lot of the consumerism in favor of home made gifts or donations to charity or most simply of all - spending time together. plus - we realize that there will be deals later, closer to the actual solstice celebration day. the prices we are seeing today will likely reappear in a few weeks and might even go lower. but the bottom line is that a lot of people are just tired of fighting over the chance to spend money. there will always be another whatchamacallit or thingamajiggie. no one's child has died from not receiving The Perfect Gift Right On Time. we all get through the hype and inevitable disappointment of everything not being the correct stuff [no matter how hard we try to make it be].

we're a resilient lot. we generally come out the other side of the solstice celebration with a renewed faith in ourselves and in The Great & Powerful Oz. perhaps it is, specifically, our meager attempts at gift-giving - at matching things to people in the perfect way - that makes us realize the superiority of everything given to us by Oz.

when you have so many blessings that you have to sort of make up stuff to complain about, then you have it good, eh?

being allowed to play in the traditional touch football game on thanksgiving should not be gender related.

it is good to have one's health.

not all girls like to cook, chat, or order jewelry from magazines.

it is good to have a warm place to sit and no pressing responsibilities.

shooting pool is harder than you might think.

it is good to have fun.

there is such a thing as too many cranberries.

it is good to have enough to eat and to have tasty food to eat.

having been a part of someone else's family for 20 years doesn't automatically translate into a desire to spend an entire afternoon with that family. hell, being a part of one's own family for any amount of time doesn't necessarily translate into wanting to spend an afternoon with them, either.

it is good to be surrounded by people who love each other.

my old man says -- «ace - you'd eat leather. you'd eat anything.» and i'd be hard pressed to disagree, but i don't eat a lot of sliders.

sliders are cheap mini hamburgers. there is no such thing as a ahi tuna slider, a lobster salad slider, a foie gras slider, or any type of gourmet slider. just as you cannot turn left to go right or use ink to wash your hands - you cannot make a gourmet slider. now, you CAN make a delicious slider. but, gourmet? no. no way.

did you hear what i heard?

did you hear about the man in belgium who was diagnosed as being in a vegetative state for 23 years and was actually conscious the entire time? what a freaking nightmare! a recently-invented kind of brain scan revealed that he was indeed concious, and so the doctor hooked him up to some sort of computer through which he can communicate. wow.

did you hear that women should have yearly mammograms starting at age 40? did you hear they should wait until 50 to have yearly mammograms? but then, they should begin at 40? at 50? at 40? 50?40?50?40? hey - what a coincidence! that's what i heard, too!

did you hear about adam lambert's performance on the a-m-a awards show? well, i can tell you about it because i saw it. the scoop is that adam's music is bland and his lyrics are trite, so he tried to distract everyone with theatrical homosexuality in his stage show. i suppose it worked b/c reactions range from bored to disgusted, but no one is talking about his [lack of] musical prowess.

did you hear that obama's first state dinner tuesday night included 320 people and cost about 1/2 million dollars? sounds like a ton of people and a ton of money, but i wonder about dinners hosted by his predecessors - how much did they cost & how many people were invited? yeah, it's nothing new - for years & years now our government has been using our money and not including us in the fun. boohoo!

reason #856473 in favor of druidism

i heard someone say the other day that she was «surrendering to christmas». this phrase so keenly hilites the trouble with the holiday season -- it's something people feel they need to resist. resist what? the joy, the love, the warmth, the laughter, the good food and the quality times with family & friends? no, it's not these things that bear resistance.

it's the overages that we put up walls against. the joy turned to mania, the love turned to lust, the warmth turned up, burning us like fiery lava and consuming all life-giving oxygen until we smother in the presence of others. too much food, too much drink. too many parties and gatherings and events to schedule. too many dysfunctions and obligations and duties. too much we have to do, not enough we get to do. i don't have an original solution. you've heard 'em all -- don't go to every party, don't eat all the food, don't buy a gift for everyone you've ever met, don't drink too much at the company holiday fest and land yourself in a compromising situation in the supply closet with that smarmy guy from accounting who's been trying to get a date with you for the past year. just say «no» to the hype, the excess, the vanity, the sheer unadulterated consumerism.

but, don't forget that overindulgence is not the heart of christmas. the heart of christmas is love. and love, my dears, is something we could all benefit from a bit more surrendering to.

what i did today

today i walked a marathon. one thing that is really weird about walking or running any long distance is how the miles pass away. i mean, we were walking for 7:09:07, and yes, it's a lovely & poetic timestamp, but it's a helluva long time. you'd think i'd have distinct memories of each step or something but it never works that way for me. i remember starting. i remember a couple of the water stops where people i knew were working the stops. i remember finishing. i remember a couple things here or there, but i don't remember things in some kind of precise order where i could be like - mile 1: this is how i felt, mile 2: this is how i felt, et cetera. it's more like - we walked a lot and stopped sometimes and finally got done.

i did a bunch of texting and shizzle and ate a bagel and rearranged my hat [backwards? forwards?] a couple dozen times. i know these things are not generally associated with "marathoning" but hell, i was out there walking and wearing a fanny pack so i really had no cool cred to lose at that point.

my ankle feels sort of okay which is better than it usually feels after running 3 miles so now i am all like -- "whatever, ankle! you suck!". it needs to decide how it feels about things and get consistent. yeah, i know - it'll probably hurt tomorrow.

i have blisters on the soles of both feet, including a double blister on the left foot that takes up like the entire frontal lobe of my left foot. i just now punctured all these blisters using a pin from my race bib and drained like a gallon of liquid from them. this did not improve my ability to use the soles of my feet for transportation.

but i wouldn't trade all the pain for anything because i personally know people who could never walk 26.2 continguously in any amount of time and probably don't even walk that far in an entire month. and, i won't always be walking -- i will run again!

books 2009

currently:
syren
[angie sage]

complete:
the witch is dead
[shirley damsgaard]
stargirl
[jerry spinelli]
the telling pool
[david clement-davies]
eye of the god
[ariel allison]
first among sequels
[jasper fford]
north river
[pete hamill]
dragonlight
[donita k paul]
world without end
[ken follett]
the associate
[john grisham]
dragonfire
[donita k paul]
dragonknight
[donita k paul]
the archbishop in andalusia
[andrew greeley]
dragonquest
[donita k paul]
dragonspell
[donita k paul]
the spiderwick chronicles, vol. 1-5
[tony diterlizzi & holly black]
devil bones
[kathy reichs]
irish tweed
[andrew greeley]
the paradise war
[stephen lawhead]
hood
[stephen lawhead]
scarpetta
[patricia cornwell]

in less than 2 complete days, i am scheduled to slog around in the woods for like 7 hours. in the rain. woowoo?

finished reading the witch is dead. it was okay. sort of a C+ effort. there was a lot of good stuff in it, but it didn't exactly tie together. i mean, all the loose ends wrapped up, but the main characters are supposed to be psychic good witches sort of like charmed except much older. but if the main point was supposed to be the psychic stuff, well then somehow it wasn't explored deeply enough. maybe b/c this was book 5 in the series, the author didn't explore these themes thoroughly, but the result was distinctly dissatisfying. the psychic stuff seemed like an afterthought sort of jammed into a mystery story. in conclusion, i probably won't be reading any others in the series.

next up - syren by angie sage. woowoo! i finally rose to the top of the hold list at the liberry. i am a good bit excited about it. in case you're wondering what to get me for xmash, the complete set of septimus heap books would be stellar. or, the magykal papers - the inside scoop on the world of septimus. woowoo!

you can put a tutu on a hippo, that don't make it no ballerina!

today i went to urban outfitters. most of the stuff there is way pricey like $50 tee shirts & shizzle, but i did find something non-clothing cute for mini-me. oooo - it's a surprise! and something clothing cute for me. i also got some really good ideas for xmash gifts for tallulah and palindromia. woowoo!

according to my running log, on 16 november my total time spent running this year was 224:24:42. cool number. that is like 10 days. 10/365=.03. 3% of my year was spent running. if it were up to me, it would have been more.

convo from the office:
officelady - «are them mayapps on the schedule?»
marketing-guy - «what is a mayapp?»
officelady - «you know. it's like what shows whar them streets are.»
marketing-guy - «ppfahahaha! yes, the maps are on the schedule.»

the govt claims 650,000 jobs created by the stimulus. here's what i want to know in relation to those jobs created by the stimulus. i just want a little context.
-- in the period feb - sept 2009, how many jobs were lost?
-- in the periods feb - sept 2008/2007/2006, how many jobs were created and how many jobs were lost?
-- in the period feb - sept 2009, how much govt money was distributed in the form of grants & loans [i.e., stimulus]?
-- in the periods feb - sept 2008/2007/2006, how much govt money was distributed in the form of grants & loans?
-- that is to say - how does the job loss & creation during this period of 2009 compare to past years? also, how does govt spending compare? specifically -- would grants & loans that are being accounted to the stimulus pkg have been paid out anyway, even w/o the stimulus, in keeping with the normal govt distribution of grants & loans?

the myth of the good time

i despise talking on telephones. in my role in the business world, the only reason someone would choose telephone over email would be that person doesn't want to be tied down to their words later. i recognize no other reason to choose telephone in business.

in the realm of personal communication, the problem with telephoning is that there is never a good time to call. everyone is busy and you will be interrupting their doing something unless you have planned the call time in advance which is lame. no one is sitting around waiting to receive phone calls.

take for instance tonight. i was supposed to call the workhorse. this was planned in advance. [lame-oooh!!] so i called and he was rushing out to take care of an emergency with a neighbor. there you have it. telephoning is stupid. he was all like - «i'll be sitting around at the emergency room. call me later.» well, hell no. i am not going to call you later. jezz. you are going to the hospital with your neighbor - you are not going to have time to TALK. jezz.

telephoning out of the blue to say hi is idiotic. you are guaranteed to have nothing to talk about. i have been told i "should" call this person or that person [and by this person i mean the crown prince and by that person i mean auntie bubble gum] and i can tell you right now how that would go. it would go thusly:

ace: « »
crown prince: « »
ace: « »
crown prince: « »
ace: « »
crown prince: « »

yeah, i think you get the basic idea and the same would go for myriad folks from auntie bubble gum to my bff from high school to brigadoonies. i don't care how much you have to say in person, there is never anything to say on the telephone.

«call me!» guess what - NO. i am not calling you. if you are determined to telephone with me, you can call me.

and you can leave a message.

because i won't answer.

because it won't be a good time.

kafka & associates, inc.

current dealings at work involve an outside technical service provider, id est: consultant, and here's the thing about consultants - it behooves them to do just enough to keep you hooked. they are masters of diversion and... and... what's that word for when you say you are going to do something but then you sort of avoid it but you act like you are doing it? starts with a "d"? sheesh. ditch? duck? defer? digress? delude? diddle? doodle? drag one's feet?

ANYWAY. they are masters of taking the smallest thing and stretching it out. when you press them for dates and attempt to hold them to milestone deadlines, they wiggle out of it. these guys keep saying they need more time to analyze the data, and sure enough, they come up with the questions. jeezumpete, the questions! you'd think they had never seen a document or piece of data - like they think cut & paste involves scissors & glue. c'mon guys!

oh, and don't suggest that they do anything differently than they had planned, because the circuitous route they have chosen is quite circumspect. the frustration is immense because it's not possible to pin them to any false move, any overstepping of the bounds. they aren't meeting the dates, and they manage to turn it around and make it OUR fault! gaaa!

this is seriously a case where if they would expend this brainpower on doing the project, they would have been done by now. of course, they are racking up the change orders, so you have to hand it to them - they know how to work-it-work-it-work-it like a polaroid picture. or, something. the point here is that the feeling that they are playing us is overwhelming. twice i have made suggestions that would have saved them significant hours, and one they turned into a change order and required us to pay for it, and the other they turned into an excuse for lateness. things that make you go - huh?? «here's a way you can save time & money.» «hey, thanks. that will cost you more money and take us more time.» WHAT?!THE?!

at this point, the goal of getting the project done well, done right, done in a quality manner -- is being dwarfed by the dual goals of extracting my career reputation intact & getting the freaking project overanddonewith!!

i sometimes feel like the people i work with may not understand some of the words i use. does that make them stupid or me smart?

what makes people think they can steal a baby out of some woman's belly? seriously. have you heard of this? it's not like it happens every day, but why on earth does it happen at all? how can this possibly seem logical to anyone: «i will cut open that woman's belly and take her bebe out and raise it as my own.» um... what the hell? like, everyone you know is going to believe you just up & had a bebe even though you weren't pregnant. and, really, it's considered bad form to take someone's tuna sandwich from the company fridge, so in what universe can you think it's going to be okay to cut someone open & take her bebe? your a idot!

yes, some people are idiots. id.i.ot. [imagine e.t. saying «eliot»... «ell-eee-uht»] here's a gal who spends more effort constructing a reason why she cannot do something than it would take her to just do it. id.i.ot. here are a couple guys piloting a plane who overshoot their target airport by 150 miles. id.i.ots. here's a guy who thinks he has to put his mouth rightnexto the microphone in order to obtain amplification. id.i.ot. here are two football players on scholarship at a major university who stage a stick-up using a b-b gun, get arrested, and lose their scholarships. id.i.ots. here is a guy who accelerates to get IN FRONT OF me in traffic when the road behind me is clear for miles & miles & miles. id.i.ot. here is a couple who give up on peyton & the colts and go to bed when the score is 31-17. id.i.ots. here is a girl who always goes to starbux because she cannot figure out how to order a cuppa at the local indie coffeeshop. id.i.ot.

yeah. the world is full of 'em.

busy sunday

got up. ate breakfast. went to grocery. ate lunch. went to soccer. picked up jersey mike's and currently watching titans game while waiting on coffee to brew. after game gotta go to autozone then my brigadoon friend will probably be here soon after that. then we'll watch the colts-pats game and then it will be bedtime. so I probably won't have time to post. this will have to do ya.

p.s. starbux beans were on sale at publix. whoppwhopp!!

go go gadget... um... go go gadget GADGETS!

from the popular mechanics gadget wish list:

the powermat charging mat: this little beauty is a real workhorse. you can place up the 3 devices on it for charging. powermat's promising to build the tech into tables & surfaces, but for now you can purchase the pad for $100. i think you may have to also purchase adapters at $30-40 a pop. the article wasn't really clear on that part.


the mypressi twist: this handheld espresso maker uses off the shelf nitrous-oxide cartridges doesn't even require power! it's small, travel friendly, and looks like fun. $170 is a bit much to pay for a toy, but if you travel a lot and you like your espresso, you might not call it a toy.


the msr flex 4 system: this compact campsite cookset has 2 pots and 4 each cups & plates all nested together for easy transport. seems a bit pricey at $160, but i don't really know that much about "real" camping gear. i am a bit more familiar with the #10 can and the paper plate, but this cookset is better than paper & trash.


the yoostar: who wouldn't like a camera, software, & green screen package that allows you to put yourself in the movies? it's so easy - you sit in front of the green screen and deliver your lines into the camera. the software does the work of putting you into the scene. sounds like an absolute ton of fun and a great bargain at $170 for the base pkg with 12 short clips. other clips are available for $1-4.


the acm wallet: not appearing in the list but shown in an ad immediately below the list, this is a $40 automatic silverthing. you put your cards into the main card holder part, and they are held securly inside until you push a button to release the card you want. it's got a money clip on the back for your cash. the cards are held separately so that they are less likely to demagnetize.

my lucky friday the 13th story

after my run today i decided that because i had the car & all, i'd just cruise on over to starbux and get me a gingerbread latte. mmmm.... probably a billion calories, but who cares?! who? who? so, i cruise over and i place my drive thru order and it's $5.03 of course b/c that's how much the triple grande lattes cost, and i am going through my silverthing looking for my visa... and i realize that last night at chick-fil-a i put it back in my purse, not in my silverthing. omg! how am i going to pay for my gingeryumyum? i am thinking i will simply have to beg for mercy and i open my iphone b/c i am obviously going to have to tweet about this, and what to my wondering eyes should appear but $5 in my iphone case. whoppwhopp! forgotten i had put that in there. i am such the glorious lovely to leave that for myself! i only had to beg for mercy on the 3¢. what luck!


for the record, my gingeryumyum did not have a gingerbread man floating in it. i just thought this pic was cute. well, cute and then of course somewhat disturbing, as the gingerman often is. why is he hot-tubbing in my latte? what is he grinning about? freaky little gingerman.

two book bits

finished jerry spinelli's stargirl and i highly recommend it. it's a sort of fable set in high school, a tale with a moral, but it doesn't hammer you over the head. spinelli's a talented writer who accurately reveals the heart, mind, feelings, thoughts of a teenage boy through the voice of the narrator. it's for a young adult audience - and by "young adult" the book industry means "teenager" - so it's written at a level that makes it an easy read for an adult reader. and, the themes will be familiar to adults and the action somewhat predictable, but it still holds together through the sincerity [sp?] of the voice and the simple setting - which rings genuine because it is so simple. i read it over the course of a few days, but the typical young adult or adult reader could knock it out in a few consecutive hours.

currently reading the witch is dead by shirley damsgaard. i guess you'd call it a mystical mystery. the main characters are women with psychic powers ranging from rune reading to mediating for the dead to communing with fairies to healing the sick. i picked it up at the 1/2 price bookstore. i remember picking it up and putting it down and returning to pick it up & put it down again a couple more times before finally picking it up and purchasing it. i was for some reason compelled to make it my own. i realized it was part of a series and realized it was not the first book in the series, but until i started reading it did not realize it is the «ophelia & abby mysteries, no. 5». number 5 is quite a bit of ways into the series to be picking it up. i do usually like to start at the beginning of a series, but i'm already reading it now so what can i do? so far, it's not as well written as stargirl. i do realize that at the beginning of the 5th book in a series there's a bit of rehashing what would be known territory for the series regulars. but, it doesn't have to be so rote. kathy reichs, the author of the temperance brennen series, is a master at [re]introducing characters at the beginning of each book in her series through the art of "show, don't tell". it's a lesson that ms damsgaard would do well to heed.

books 2009

currently:
the witch is dead
[shirley damsgaard]

complete:
stargirl
[jerry spinelli]
the telling pool
[david clement-davies]
eye of the god
[ariel allison]
first among sequels
[jasper fford]
north river
[pete hamill]
dragonlight
[donita k paul]
world without end
[ken follett]
the associate
[john grisham]
dragonfire
[donita k paul]
dragonknight
[donita k paul]
the archbishop in andalusia
[andrew greeley]
dragonquest
[donita k paul]
dragonspell
[donita k paul]
the spiderwick chronicles, vol. 1-5
[tony diterlizzi & holly black]
devil bones
[kathy reichs]
irish tweed
[andrew greeley]
the paradise war
[stephen lawhead]
hood
[stephen lawhead]
scarpetta
[patricia cornwell]

patricia heaton's a bit too up for handing out award at the cma's. calm the freak down, trish. it's cma's for gsakes, not the 4h poster contest.

arriving in the email today from the local harley store was an ad for their »«massive boot sale»«. i am not going because i have regular size feet.

my old man does a bit of substitute teaching. today he was subbing for a 6th grade class, and one of the young lads in class did not know how to use a dictionary. for realz, yo. did not know how to look up words to find definitions in a dictionary. the word the class was looking for was »«morals»«. the fact that 6th graders didn't know the defintion of »«morals»« is yet another problem, is it not?

my jog today took me past a new dinery. it's one of those really quiet club-type places, but there was a guy out front doing some kind of measuring for window work or somesuch, so my running buddy axed him what was the name of the place. i just now looked it up and the news bit about it states it »«will offer an elaborate roster of cocktails mixed with house-made syrups and bitters and poured over eight types of twice-filtered ice.»« eight types of ice??!!

we're sitting here watching the cma awards show. i am glad ol' hootie has made the transition to country b/c he wasn't getting any airtime as a pop singer, and i just like his voice. brad paisley is also good, and kenny chesney, and i will always love george straight. l.o.v.e. sitting here right now listening to the zac browne band, and i am going to have to say i am impressed. very.impressed. as a rule, i am not a big fan of the girl singers. except for miranda lambert. and, carrie underwood. and, leeanne rimes. and, expeshally taylor swift. but, not reba macintyre, and not martina mcbride, and not really faith hill, and not kelly pickler, and not keith urban, and expeshally NOT sugarland. omg NOT sugarland. CaPiTaL »«NOT»« sugarland. whew. let's stop thinking about sugarland and get back to thinking about george. whoppwhopp! george!

just a couple things

steven tyler has left aerosmith. this is a band that is very nearly 40 years old. what the hell is he doing leaving now? another icon that turned 40 this week - sesame street. apparently, steven tyler once did a cover of oscar the grouch's "i love trash" but other than that and the similar age - there doesn't seem to be a connection.

i feel the need to reiterate that i have no interest in the stay-at-home mom's secret to white teeth. i use walgreen's whitening trays, and they work just fine for me. i would also like to say that i am unsure about this whole «obama wants moms to go back to school» thing, but i am fairly certain the boogie-down dancer who is consistently shown with this ad is not an accurate portrayal of a back-to-school mom.

michael jackson was laid to rest in a $35k suit. that, my friends, is totally & completely wack. in other news of the wackitude - mr samuel botchvaroff of vallejo, california, was due in court to face charges of auto theft. he didn't have any way to get to court because his car had been impounded. so... c'mon... i know you can get this one... he did what? he stole a car to get to the hearing, and was caught sitting in the stolen car outside the courthouse. eejit of wackitude!

taylor swift is dating taylor lautner. if they get married, they should switch their last names with first and be mr & mrs taylor, swift & lautner.

my iphone had a spaz. turning it off didn't help. rebooting it didn't help. syncing [synching?] it didn't help. thought i was going to have to delete all the apps, but after deleting twitterific and facebook, the appstore app lit up with 2 updates - shazam and fox23 news. updated those 2 and tried a few apps and wahlah everything is working! reloaded twitterific & fb. even scramble2 is working again which is sort of weird now that i have wordpops b/c i can't decide which to play.

i am getting kind of tired of people telling me i am "lucky" to have an iphone. it's not like the $30 a month to pay the internet usage fee just appeared in my wallet. it's not like the $200 to purchase the device just appeared in my checking account. i work hard for the money. so hard for it, honey. i work hard for the money, so you'd better treat me right.


all my life, all i can remember is that there was not enough money. can't have the icee, not enough money. can't have the cute socks, not enough money. can't have a milkshake, a soda, a pack of gum, a watch, a record, a book, that necklace, that lip gloss, that shirt, the concert tickets, the new furniture, the camera, the art supplies. nothing nada zip zilch zero. no extras. no treats. wait for your birthday. wait for christmas. get a job. get your own money.

i am finally there. yeah, the roof needs to be replaced. yeah, the carpet is ancient and the appliances are broken, and there are big huge things that need to be done. but i am finally at the point where i can seriously save to pay actual cash money for the big stuff, and in the meantime, i can have the little stuff, too. i can have the kiwis and the lattes. i can go to the movies or buy a dvd. i can register for a 5k without waiting for payday. i can purchase a $15 fleece jacket at target and not return it the next day sick with guilt that i won't have the cash to cover it and the electric bill both.

so, yeah. i have an iphone. if you have to label it, you can call it a blessing or you can call it hard work - but don't call it luck.

quarter-finals: we win 3-1. semi's: we lose 1-2.

::sigh:: outdoor futbol's over for the season. in a couple weeks the indoor season will be over. ::sigh::

but my old man ordered a pizza to be delivered and we're watching the titans, so it's all good. the titans game is being reffed [refed? ref'd?] by carl cheffers. this is carl's second year as a referee. he has been a side judge since 2000 and was promoted last year when a couple guys retired. carl lives in california with his wife & kids. upon promoting him, the referee director said of carl: "he is very knowledgeable of the rules, a good rules guy. strong presence... clearly a crew leader." good for you, carl!

so we're sitting here waiting on the pizza and i am getting pretty hungry. delivery has a price, and you pay in time. we don't order from dominos, so it takes more than 30 minutes to arrive, but it is supposably a better quality pizza. that matters to my old man - doesn't really matter to me. i like good pizza and bad pizza. i like cheap frozen pizza that you eat at home - well, i don't like it actually frozen like a pizza popsicle. you know what i mean. i like handmade gourmet hot-to-your-table pizza you eat at the restaurant. i like cold pizza that's leftover for breakfast the next day, or like, later in the week. i like anything on pizza - except onions or hamburger, but if they're on it, i'll .....

PIZZA'S HERE!! ACE OUT!!

monkeying around

sweet baby james is coming to run my marathon. well, not like i own the marathon and not like he is running in my place or something. but, this is the 4th year for this marathon, and i've run it every year so far, and i am personally acquainted with the race director, so it's as mine as it gets.

the event is delightful. you get a bib and a shirt with your name on them. you can get a cool hatch show print poster. there are special stickers for your car and last year there were temporary tattoos. the running is through the woods on paved trails up & down hills amongst trees. it's really the most fabulous fun you can have for 26.2 miles. the night before, there's a passgetti dinner. after completing the race, you get a medal and a door prize and there's a potluck of food and a couple kegs of local brew. as far as marthons go, this one is the best.

sweet baby james has been training diligently for months - doing his long runs and his short runs and his in-between runs. he's been running fast and nearly never walking and going up hills and down hills and fitting in his runs between work and family and running early in the morning and running late at night and running running running.

in the moments when i can put aside the all-consuming envy i feel for all things running... in the moments when i can take a deep breath and maturely recognize that this summer was my summer to be injured, making this fall not my fall to train, but that there will be another summer and another fall, and i can choose to do things differently then... in the moments when i can make that extra effort not to think about myself... in those moments i am filled with happiness for sweet baby james and his enjoyment of his glorious training cycle and i swell with pride that this is my sweet baby brother -- who before he could walk, slept with his wee tiny pigeon-toed feet strapped together at the heels in hopes that one day he would "walk right" -- that is now preparing to come to my park and run my marathon.

but then the moment passes, and i just want to sit on him and tickle him till he begs for mercy.

don't let daley drive the firetruck.

from carpooling coworker's odo - 42024.

tonight we went to see the local high school football team play a district playoff game about an hour away. so it was like local, only not. [insert myriad details of excitements both good & bad, many mistakes and missed chances, and a few brilliant plays.] our team won 33-30!!

scramble and scramble2 seem to be not only merely dead, but really most sincerely dead. they will not activate live online at all, not even a little bit. so, i have taken up word pops which is a combination of spelling and tetris. it is delightful.

today i called the help desk to get a cabinet moved. the property services guy called me back. convo went something like this:
prop svcs: «what do you need moved?»
ace: «a cabinet.»
prop svcs: «a lateral file?»
ace: «no, a cabinet.»
prop svcs: «a bookshelf?»
ace: «no, a cabinet. like with doors.»
prop svcs: «a cabinet?»
ace: «exactly. a cabinet.»
prop svcs: «okay, well, we will have to come take a look at it to see what it is.»

today at the store i found & purchased a fruitcake. a fruitcake for me to eat. mmmm.... fruitcake.

in defence of futbol

here is the secret to playing futbol defence - stay between your mark & the goal. that's it. you don't have to do any of the other stuff - stealing the ball, intercepting the pass, clearing the ball. you WILL do all the other stuff b/c that's how it will happen if you are in position. but all you have to know is - stay between your player and the goal. you will occassionally have chances to step in front of your mark to intercept the pass. you'll have a chance to steal the ball while you mark's messing around with it. but - it's not necessary to force these things. all you really have to do is... stay in position. the other stuff will all come to you. well, most of the time it will. and, if it doesn't - well you're really no worse off. if you've stayed in position, you've done your job. the problem is staying focused because it's so simple. keep yourself between your mark and the goal. that's it.

turth

yesterday i sent one of those emails where you think it's courageous and then it sort of blows up and you wonder about that line between courage and foolishness. today i took a deep breath and pushed it even further and guess what - it all worked out just fine. why? because truth is the best way to go.

truth: nic cage is broke. more than broke - in debt. apparently his financial advisor is a greedy cheater. here's a pic of nic. he's looking a little rough, don't you think? no doubt being in debt puts a wee bit of wear on one's mien. perhaps nic could learn a thing or two from ford motor company.

truth: ford motor company is making money. ford took no bail out money. good ol' "fix or repair daily" deserves another look. ford started cutting back a couple years ago - closing factories, cutting back production, discontinuing non-profitable sales franchises, pulling in the lines, battening down the hatches, so on & so forth. they started this a couple years ago when things started going south for them. they didn't wait for things to totally fall apart - they started fixing things before the problems got out of hand. last quarter, ford pulled in nearly a billion dollars in profit. impressive.

truth: nba has started its season. mlb and nascar finishing up their seasons. nfl is in mid-season. golf is currently out of season. futbol is always being played by someone, somewhere. tennis... tennis... who gives a hoot about tennis?

truth: the best thing about tennis is the tretorn.

books 2009

currently:
stargirl
jerry spinelli

complete:
the telling pool
david clement-davies
eye of the god
[ariel allison]
first among sequels
[jasper fford]
north river
[pete hamill]
dragonlight
[donita k paul]
world without end
[ken follett]
the associate
[john grisham]
dragonfire
[donita k paul]
dragonknight
[donita k paul]
the archbishop in andalusia
[andrew greeley]
dragonquest
[donita k paul]
dragonspell
[donita k paul]
the spiderwick chronicles, vol. 1-5
[tony diterlizzi & holly black]
devil bones
[kathy reichs]
irish tweed
[andrew greeley]
the paradise war
[stephen lawhead]
hood
[stephen lawhead]
scarpetta
[patricia cornwell]

raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens, bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens, brown paper packages tied up with string -

these are a few of my favorite things.

- my gauged earrings that mini-me gave to me. it's not like i'm trying to make my ear holes bigger, but they are like rebel earrings for a cautious rebel. i mean, they ARE gauged... just really teeny gauge. heh. i like that i can put these in & just leave 'em. they go with everything. they don't hurt to sleep in. i can play futbol with them in. i like how they look.

- my killers hot fuss cd that mini-me gave me. i was listening to this for the bagillionth time the other day on the way to futbol. mini-me gave me this for... christmas, i think. when she gave it to me, it was the first new cd i had had in many years. it was like an introduction to the music of the modern world b/c at the time i was re-re-re-replaying all the billy joel, jackson browne, eagles, and dan fogelberg cd's i had had for a couple dozen years. this cd reopened my musical life. and, it is a really good cd.

- my nintendo ds that mini-me gave me. favorite games: tetris & galaga. unfortunately, grownups are not allowed to take the ds to the 'shroom for a couple rounds of tetris while waiting on the pizza. sometimes it is truly tiresome to be a grownup. kids are allowed -- nay, encouraged -- to sit quietly and play the ds. it's just not fair!!

- my mystery answer watch that mini-me gave me. i wear this watch every single day. i do usually wear a dress watch to work, except on fridays, but i put on the mystery answer watch as soon as i get home. it seems so simple, but it's really fabulous. it's just the right size and has all the normal functionality - time, date, chrono, alarm, timer, and indiglo. the indiglo comes in handy for those dark-of-night trips to the fred. i like to know what time it is so i know how much more sleeping i can do. plus the greatest thing about the mystery answer watch is the mystery answer feature. it's like having a magic eight ball on my wrist. stellar!

- my chuck taylors that mini-me gave me. they're plain lo-rise black chucks. perfect for a young urban hipster like me. they go great with skirts & shorts & skorts & pants. they're probably a little too clean b/c i probably take a little too good care of them. but, hey, they're MY chucks - i'll treat 'em how i want!


in conclusion: mini-me rocks.

cotton is for winners.

i like to wear cotton tees and futbol shorts when i go for a run. many "real" runners would mock this attire, but to them i say - pah.

although i wear futbol shorts year round, there're really not that many days when i can wear the cotton tees. in summer, with the humidity & the heat, there's simply too much sweat for the cotton tee. chafing takes a great deal of the fun out of a run. in the winter, it's too cold for a cotton tee. the double cotton tee can work but is usually not the paragon of comfort because the inner shirt won't stay put and i end up garroted by my clothing. so, in the summer and in the winter, i opt for the technical tops. but, in the spring & fall there are some days you'll find me in cotton.

the feel of the cotton is different than the technical tees - the cotton's heavier, it has a substance to it that the technical tees lack. cotton moves with me, but has it's own shape, too. it's like the cotton could have gone out on it's own run - by itself - but it chose to come with me, to keep me company, to enjoy the day together. something about the cotton is old school, simple. put on the tee shirt, shorts, shoes - go for a run. just a run. not a long or a short or a tempo or an easy or intervals or repeats or speed work or hill work or anythehellkinda work. just put on the cotton, just go for a run... just a run.

size "matters". get it? matters = "is important" and matters = "issues surrounding". it's a double-entendre. did you get it? did you? did?you???????

we watched cbs sunday morning from a couple weeks ago this morning [yay tivo!]. it was the fat-fatties special edition - but it was called "size matters" not "fat-fatties".

they had a story about valerie bertinelli, who i have always believed to be a close personal friend - probably b/c my bff in high school looked like valerie. i am fairly certain if valerie lived next door we'd be great pals b/c really, who could help themselves from being pals with me if they lived next door? i am just that special. at any rate, i am a fan of valerie.

another story was about fried foods at the texas state fair, including deep fried pizza, coke, corn dogs, latte, bacon, cookie dough, and the big hit this year: deep fried butter. i kid you not. people seemed to really be enjoying it, but i am fairly certain people would eat & enjoy mud if you deep fried it. the deep fried food culture is not filled with what you'd call connoisseurs.

another story was about a sort of fat camp for grown ups at duke university. these folks were taking eat-right classes and learning about what foods are good for them [hint: NOT deep fried butter] and exercising together. this one guy had been to the fat camp three years in a row, but he said he was sure he'd learned this year how to manage his weight and would not need to come back. but - i am not convinced returning to fat camp is about learning or not learning. i would venture to say that spending a couple weeks having your meals prepared and playing water volleyball with a poolful of fat-fatties is actually real, true fun. what's the harm in fun? someone should open sleep-away camps for grown ups. fat-fatties or not - grown ups could benefit from this sort of adventure.

there is an aspect of fat camp that would be very difficult to translate to the real world - group exercising. where are you going to find a dozen people, a pool, a net, and a ball - all available at the same time and willing to suit up for a game of water volleyball? i hope that they're teaching these folks to opt for the stairs over the elevators and to park further away from the mall - to put movement into their everyday existence. ["movement" as in "moving around" - not as in "number 2". heh. number 2. heh-heh.]

the fattest states are missippy, bamalama, and west virginny. apparently the citizens of west virginny are not satisfied with being almost in heaven and are eagerly eating their way to the actual after-life location.

in conclusion, valerie bertinelli is my bff.