the myth of the good time

i despise talking on telephones. in my role in the business world, the only reason someone would choose telephone over email would be that person doesn't want to be tied down to their words later. i recognize no other reason to choose telephone in business.

in the realm of personal communication, the problem with telephoning is that there is never a good time to call. everyone is busy and you will be interrupting their doing something unless you have planned the call time in advance which is lame. no one is sitting around waiting to receive phone calls.

take for instance tonight. i was supposed to call the workhorse. this was planned in advance. [lame-oooh!!] so i called and he was rushing out to take care of an emergency with a neighbor. there you have it. telephoning is stupid. he was all like - «i'll be sitting around at the emergency room. call me later.» well, hell no. i am not going to call you later. jezz. you are going to the hospital with your neighbor - you are not going to have time to TALK. jezz.

telephoning out of the blue to say hi is idiotic. you are guaranteed to have nothing to talk about. i have been told i "should" call this person or that person [and by this person i mean the crown prince and by that person i mean auntie bubble gum] and i can tell you right now how that would go. it would go thusly:

ace: « »
crown prince: « »
ace: « »
crown prince: « »
ace: « »
crown prince: « »

yeah, i think you get the basic idea and the same would go for myriad folks from auntie bubble gum to my bff from high school to brigadoonies. i don't care how much you have to say in person, there is never anything to say on the telephone.

«call me!» guess what - NO. i am not calling you. if you are determined to telephone with me, you can call me.

and you can leave a message.

because i won't answer.

because it won't be a good time.