happy new month!

the new dedication to philosophical, historical, social, ethical, or otherwise sage & erudite issues starts now. whadda ya got? i got nothing. okay, on to the drivel.

office kitchenette rule #832: oatmeal is a breakfast food and should not be cooked after highnoon except in cases of dire emergency such as someone holding a gun to your head. and, if someone is holding a gun to your head forcing you to cook oatmeal in the workplace, it's time to get a new gig.

valediction is a farewell speech. valedictorian is one who delivers a farewell speech. sounds simple enough, does it not? however, a quick perusal of dictionary.com provides 4 defs, 2 of which have an interesting nuance. the first says a valedictorian is the one who delivers the speech at graduation - usually the one with the best grades. the other says a valedictorian is one who has the best grades - usually the one who delivers the speech at graduation. according to the purest meaning of the word, it is NOT one with the highest rank - it is the one who delivers the speech, despite his or her rank. see the nuance? i knewanced you would.

today, it snowed. not here so much as other places. such at santa's workshop.

speaking of snow, what about ol' plaxico burress? he had a handgun in his pants and was out at the club. he does not have a concealed handgun permit. his pal pierce said - yo, plax, man... is that your gun, or you just happy to see me? b/c ol' plax's gun was showing, dontcha know. so, plax goes to reposition his weapon, and shoots himself in the leg. now, he is up on weapons charges b/c it is difficult to deny you have a gun in your pants when you shoot yourself in the leg. a couple of tips if you are packing in your pants - be sure the safety is on & do not under any circumstances reposition your weapon by grasping it by the trigger. clearly, plax was not the validictorian of his class.