it's monday night. not tuesday night or wednesday night. monday night. grocery store & 24. monday night.

can you believe martha stabbed charles with the kiwi knife? criminy!

are you a waffle-well filler or a syrup dumper? or, maybe you're a dipper? waffle-well fillers carefully pour syrup in each waffle-well before even thinking about eating a single bite. syrup dumpers just pour on the syrup willy-nilly and tuck into the waffle straightaway. dippers pour a pool of syrup on the plate, then cut & dip each bite. do you put syrup on your sausage, too? eat the sausage with the waffle, or keep it separate?

some people can wear scarves and look brilliant. i put on a scarf, and it looks like i'm going to a sock hop. what's the deal with that? i mean, is it the scarf or the technique? okay, the most likely explanation is that i am a doofus, but how hard can it be? why can't i get the hang of this? why? why?

snoop dog was arrested in stockholm for suspicion of drug use. say it ain't so! snoop on drugs? the next thing you know they will be telling us that sugar causes weight gain. gaaa!

tonight on leno: headlines and my chemical romance. stellar. letterman now has a feature called small town news, which is an obvious riff on leno's headlines. way to be original there, letterman.
the weatherman just now advised we wear a jacket at the bus stop in the morning and take a walk outside at lunchtime b/c the weather will be nice. okay, buddy -- how 'bout you forecast the weather, and we will forecast our wardrobe & behaviour. jeez-um-peetey.