why can't blogger ever remember where i put my pictures?

as a general rule, boys who play sports generally seek individual glory, generally speaking. (this is a generalization.) girls who play sports seek team glory. (another generalization.) the point is that coaching girls and coaching boys is different.

with boys, you appeal to their sense of self. you show a boy ways to gain personal growth and success in sport. the team is secondary to him, so in order to get him to contribute to the team, you remind him of his personal contribution. a starting position on varsity will be important to a boy because it communicates to the world his superiority, so a starting position on varsity would be a goal for a boy. when you coach boys in soccer, the challenge is getting them to ever pass the ball or acknowledge their teammates at all.

with girls, you appeal to their sense of team. you show a girl ways to gain team growth and success in sport. the self is secondary to her, so in order to get her to contribute to the team, you remind her that her contribution is one of many and that others are counting on her to do her part. a starting position on varsity will be important to a girl because it communicates to the world that she is part of a special unit, so a starting position on varsity would be a goal for a girl. when you coach girls in soccer, the challenge is getting them to ever take a shot or make an individual standout plays at all.

note that while both boys and girls will seek to play sports at a high level and both will seek varsity starting positions, the motivation for these same goals is quite different. that means the way you reach them, inspire them, coach them, is different. yes, these are generalizations and yes, they may even sound stereotypical, but it behooves a coach who seeks success to acknowledge that these generalities exist. as is the nature of generalities, there will be exceptions, and coaches ignore those exceptions to their detriment, but successful coaches integrate both the general case and the exception.