they say that grilled chicken sammiches cause cancer anyway.

we sought quick protein so i swung into the local KFC/KGC. that's right, KGC - kentucky GRILLED chicken - which is what we were after, but which may not in fact actually exist. we did not succeed in receiving it.

i pulled up to the drive thru and the disembodied female voice said, "hang on a minute."

ooookay....

after a few mins, "what can i get ya?"

and i was like, "two #6 combos and both of those with no sauce and no cheese, and with fries. do you have sweetea?"

"yes."

"then give me a sweetea and a diet pepsi."

ew. pepsi.

"that'll be $10.93."

i drove around to the window and waited. waited. waited. waited. ::sigh:: this is not chick-fil-a. waited. waited. finally she came to the window.

"we ain't got no sweetea."

well, that's good then because your double negative reveals that you have the stuff, so you can give me some.

"fine. just give me the sandwiches then, not the combos."

"that will cost you more."

and, by that she surely meant that she didn't want to re-ring it. surely. surely a sandwich doesn't actually cost more than a combo. surely.

"fine. pepsi."

ew. pepsi.

so she gave me the drinks and took my money and i waited. waited. waited. waited. waited. and then she passed me a bag of food, and i took it and drove on home.

when we unpacked the bag, what pray tell did it contain? two FRIED sammiches and 2 small orders of fries, and when i say small, i mean my fries contained 4 pieces of fryness. 4 fried potato pieces. 4 fries! that's like a double extry small. sheesh. one thing about the sammiches that WAS grilled was the bun, and each bun had these BLACK grill marks across it. nice, huh? so we skipped the buns and ate the FRIED protein and the 4 fries per each and the pepsis. (ew. pepsi.)

then i got onto the computer to write KGC a note about this experience. i went to the website and it is equal in ridiculosity to the visit itself. i have never jumped through so many hoops and plowed through so many interrelated drop-downs simply to tell someone how terrible a visit was, but i persevered because the feedback loop is a vital part of our service economy and i like to do my part in oiling the giant economic wheel.