when at first i learned to speak, i used all my words to fight.

my family of origin was your typical jacked up hot mess of addiction, secrets, and passive-aggressive manipulation. love was an insult and affection, a bribe. we amused ourselves by throwing the chips from our shoulders at the hearts on each other's sleeves. we were too smart by half and too clever by half, and none of us got enough exercise. we gamely hung in there as best we could but the whole thing eventually sprung apart in the mid-80s like an overstuffed sofa pounded by the relentlessly jumping feet of crazed kangaroo.

that's not to say that i don't appreciate all i learned from the man who headed up the debacle. truth is, he taught me a lot of really valuable lessons.