karmalize THEM apples!

today while out careening around the snow-covered sidewalks, i spotted a note tucked into a car window. a light green 4x6 sized lined notecard scribbled with some feminine script. being the curious type, i got a little bit closer and read this: Because you parked here, I could not get to my 2 jobs today. You need to move your car tomorrow. (I got your license #.)

firstly, i'd have to say to miss work*2 that moving the car tomorrow will result in yet another day's lost work. to facilitate work*2 getting to work, the car must be moved BEFORE tomorrow.

okay.

now, let's examine why the offender's car's being parked right-there would prevent young work*2 from attending to her work*2 duties.

- scenario 1 - the most obvious conclusion is that by parking right-there, the offender blocked in the car of work*2 who could then not attend work b/c she could not transport herself to work. which of course begs the question - why didn't she find another way to get to work? well, prolly b/c she is lazy and saw this as a great opportunity to skip out, but let's give her the benefit of the doubt and say that she tried to find a way but buses don't route from her home to her work. the public transport in this town is wack, so that's possible. and, a taxi is prolly too expensive. and, there's prolly no one she could carpool with. and, she prolly could not walk to work or ride a bicycle or telecommute or strap on a jet-pack. so, yes, scenario 1 is easily logical.

but, i am here to caution you against easy logic.

- scenario 2 - work*2 is severly decapacitated by OCD, which while better than being decapitated by OCD, is nonetheless quite a hassle. perhaps she must walk on the street at this one precise location, making public transportation - or any transportation - a moot point. the offender's car is parked at the one & only geographical location that work*2 must place her feet before proceeding with her day. as long as the car is parked there, work*2 is parked, too.

- scenario 3 - work*2 lives in the sewers below the street and the offending vehicle is parked across her front door. this scenario obviously breaks down along the how-did-she-post-the-note lines unless... work*2 was away from home and upon returning found a vehicle parked across her front door. she cannot return home, thus she cannot eat, bathe, change clothes, or otherwise prepare for work. she wrote the note and skulked off into the bushes.

- scenario 4 - the offending vehicle is parked on the actual person of work*2. i didn't see any evidence of this, so it's pretty much unsupported, but possible.

- scenario 5 - work*2 knows personally and is messing with the owner of the offending vehicle. there's a lot of potential for inside jokes just in those few words that were scribbled on a green lined notecard and tucked in the driver's side window.

NOW.

here's one thing i didn't tell you yet, a tidbit i was holding back. work*2 signed her name: »karma«. for realz, yo! KARMA! knowing this little factoid makes scenario 5 more plausible, yes? yes. and, this:

- scenario 6 - work*2 is karma. yeah, what i mean is not that »karma« is a person's name, but rather that this note was written by Karma - THE Karma. let's look at the evidence: The Karma has 2 jobs - giving good stuff and giving bad stuff - and both jobs are quite important as a balance must be kept, so if The Karma could not get to work she'd probably leave a terse notification. The Karma would require that you move your car, yet The Karma would not report you nor have you towed. The Karma would let you know that The Karma knows who you are [(I got your license #.)] but The Karma would leave the ball in your court. The Karma would tell you what was expected, what you needed to do, but The Karma would leave it up to you to do it, and the consequences of non-compliance would be left shrouded in mystery.

but here's the thing. if The Karma wasn't at work today, does that mean that we got a free pass today or that she'll be back double-timing the work*2 tomorrow?! zoinks!